Saturday, January 31, 2015

Holding Space

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We all want to be heard and understood. Can you make the extra effort to listen today? Or if you are in need of being listened to -- make sure you think about who would be supportive, ask for support and let them know that you just need an ear.

Sometimes, we offer advice with good intent but that's not what most people need.

Most of the time, we simply need to be witness to others.

This means being okay with being uncomfortable in ourselves to some degree, when our loved ones are in pain, as loving companions we want to ease their suffering.

But know that our pain as individuals gives us the pressure and experience we need to grow into who we are to become.

We must not try to take anyones' pain from them, sometimes that means we shouldn't even touch a person so that we don't interrupt the flow of emotion until all that is ready to be transformed can come through.

Not an easy task but so rewarding once you mindfully pause for your loved one and see the gift of growth through the process of releasing pain. 

We call this holding space.

We will never understand completely where someone is coming from or how they feel totally, just as we will never be understood totally but we can share our experience as an olive branch to let others know that we have been in similar situations but honor the difference of experience.

Be a witness, be clear when you need to be heard, consider the source you are asking support from and know that you are the only one that can be completely understood by yourself. Understand when you have expectations of others that may be unrealistic and let them be who they are as you ask for support.

~ Julia

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